Canto II, pt 5 - Love at First Sight

Their eye-beames twisted and thred upon one double string

Their eyes first met across the onions,
And over discount wine,
A granny's bulging shopping trolley,
A 'Caution! Wet Floor!' sign.

Their eyes first met, their fates were sealed,
Beside the loose potatoes;
Who would think their life could change
In Morrissons or Waitrose?

Canto II, pt 4 - Reconnaissance

Robyn does a recce

With song in mind, Rob made a move,
To where he might inspect her,
To get a glance to give him chance
To like or to reject her.

He passed right by the oranges,
He passed the tangerines,
He passed right by satsumas too,
He passed the clementines.

He passed right by the capsicums,
He passed beside bananas,
He strolled unheeding through the shop,
He left behind sultanas.

And there among the fruit and veg,
In guise of normal shopping,
He found the place to see her face
And stare with eyes a-popping.

Canto II, pt 3 - Robyn sing'st

Rob sing'st a lay of litel humour, but very much instruction

Girls seen from the rear
Might seem very dear,
But I'll warn you right now, there's a lot you should fear.
Her bottom you've gauged, that's all very well,
But to speak of her face, it's too early to tell.

If all a man seeks
Are some ripe peachy cheeks
Then more than enough are a few rearview peeks;
But while bottoms are nice, and important to boot,
You better check first that her face is as cute.

Some men attest
That bottoms are best
And don't give a shit about all the rest.
It was once said to me, though it caused me some ire:
'Who looks at the mantelpiece when stoking the fire?'

That's not for me,
I just don't agree,
Because I'm on a quest for a much fairer she;
A nice curvy bottom, seductive round hips,
Should be matched with a pair of ruby red lips.

Now there's nowt wrong with thighs,
But a truly great prize
Is the face that'll draw a thousand sad sighs;
The front that presents an industrial view
Will leave you a fruit that's too bitter to chew.

Canto II, pt 2 - A Ladie Fresh and Faire

Robyn do'st his eyes and senses feed with vaine delights

But having barely started shopping
A sight left Robyn's jaw a-dropping;
He stumbled, slipped,
He almost tripped,
He staggered with his heart a-stopping.

Across the way and also shopping,
With bra strap down her shoulder dropping,
With raven hair,
And midriff bare,
A girl left Robyn's heart a-stopping.

Canto II, pt 1 - Maid Maryan of Morrissons

Here beginneth Part the Second

Robyn seeketh sustenance to salve 8 centuries hunger

Bounding up the steps, Robin slipped
In through the sliding door;
He passed the guard and all the tills
And went into the store.

The arrows rattled in the quiver,
Bells tinkled on his feet,
And off he took his light green cap;
He came in off the street.

He strolled right by the checkout girls,
Passed the low price pledge
He passed the packing families,
And entered fruit and veg.

*

His foray goes not unespyed

Now you and I know Robin well,
His garb is no concern,
But the young enthusiastic guard
Could not so well discern
Our hero's noble nature,
Nor knew his goodly name,
And was even less aware
Of Robin's universal fame.

Seeing the tights, the cap, the bow,
The arrows in the quiver,
Seeing the rattling arrowheads'
Bright steely shiver,
Suspicion reared his ugly head,
Something wasn't right;
That jobsworth quick decided
To keep him well within his sight.

He kept the radio close at hand,
Pulled his cap on tight,
He made his name badge nice and straight,
Checked everything was right;
He strolled right by the checkout girls,
Passed the low price pledge,
He strutted by the packing shoppers,
And entered fruit and veg.

Canto I, pt 6 - Robyn is becomme an outlawe

Robyn doth effect an retraite tactique

On his feet, Robyn’s off,
And fast, he doesn’t dally;
His enemies can only scoff
Though quickly now they rally.

Robyn runs, stumbles, trips,
Is up and off again,
Deaf to his rivals’ fading quips,
Who dither in his train.

Out front, he looks to hide,
He’s no time to delay,
He finds a bush and creeps inside,
From where he might waylay.

*

Robyn is becomme an outlawe

Then Robyn Hode, he set his bow,
And fired the arrow straight.
A warning shot he fired at them,
He didn’t hesitate.

Then Robyn Hode, he set his bow
And fired the arrow straight;
He fired it at the chasing boys,
Who didn’t anticipate.

Then Robyn Hode, he set his bow,
He fired the arrow straight;
He fired it at the chasing boys;
For one it was too late.

Since Robyn Hode, he set his bow,
He fired the arrow straight;
He hit a boy who fell down dead
And went to meet his fate.

Canto I, pt 5 - Therewith embattailment enseweth

They gan to hurtlen greedily, redoubted battaile to darrayne

One swells his breast
And with his chest
He shoves our hero back.
But Rob comes round
And stands his ground;
They square up to attack.

He raised his fist,
He aimed, he missed;
Robin ducks the blow.
His second try
Was not awry
This time Rob’s too slow.

A punch from Rob,
A duck, a bob,
Our hero shows his mettle,
He blocks a shot,
What skill he’s got,
Our hero’s in fine fettle.

No duck, no bob,
He hits our Rob
And this time draws some blood.
One more round,
Rob’s on the ground,
It doesn’t look too good.

A well aimed kick
Though does the trick
And knocks one to the floor,
He ducks, he weaves,
He ups and leaves,
He won’t wait round for more.